January 20, 2005:

Sometimes I think we forget to look around and look at all the good things going on in our lives instead of looking at the failures. Granted, we hold ourselves to higher standards than others may but instead of beating ourselves up, we should just recognize it's a tiny blip on the screen.

Professionally, I have never felt so comfortable and happy doing what I do now. I really do LOVE my job, which is the first time in a long time. Some days suck but overall, I get to break stuff which I'm really good at. I get a sense of what's wrong and I can find all the little things to improve upon. It's cool when you're good at what you do ... decent pay, small company and definite potentional to make some cash in the future when they sell the company or go public. Now that's cool.

I'm also back in school, learning some new things about technical writing. Along with that I'm going to be taking some fun classes, learning fun stuff. And that's always made me happy ...

Romantically, it has been interesting but over the past week instead of having focus on something that wasn't real, I just turned away from it. Surprisingly, I found myself hopeful about the future instead of beating myself up about the past. I guess when you do let go, you really do become free.

Financially, things are looking up because of my job. I'm slowly getting things back on track ... money into savings, debt is going down and things are falling into place.

So even though everything isn't absolutely the pure moments of happiness that I'd like ... things are looking up. I'm lucky to have a good job, enough money to play around with, friends that are amazing and the ability to overcome anything that's put in front of me. I've been in worse spots ... this is nothing.